The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
