Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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