Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
