When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
