so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
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Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
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You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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