Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
