bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
