well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Randomize
