i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
