i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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