Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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