...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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