i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
