Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize