I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize