no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
