Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize