remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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