The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
