I've blown a few things in my day
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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