it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
