New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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