I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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