And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
