Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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