i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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