Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Drunk is not a location!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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