genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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