Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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