I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
