Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
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It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
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Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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