i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
