Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Randomize