Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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