Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
