hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
