There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize
