But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
