Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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