I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
