when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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