Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
