handjob tips. give me some.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
