you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I'm always down for nudity.
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