He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
