we're blogging at a bar
That's intense
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
the room spins SO much faster in panama
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
