ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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