so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
