I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
