we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
