I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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